Nature vs. nurture? Not even a question in my mind. I was enlightened when I became a Mother of Boys (M.O.B.). For anyone out there still debating nature vs. nurture, I know the answer. It’s nature, people! Nine years into being a M.O.B., I am still mind-blown by the otherwise ordinary activities that play out like full-contact sports in my house. Things that my sister and I calmly did together as kids lead to instantaneous brawls between my boys. Is it like this in your M.O.B. house? Here are 10 examples of full-contact sports my boys engage in. (and to think I had once said they weren’t sporty!)
OK, boys, sort the edge pieces vs. the inside pieces, and . . . WHY ARE YOU SITTING ON HIS HEAD? JUST BECAUSE HE’S HOLDING THE PIECE YOU WANTED TO PUT IN?
BUILDING WITH TOY TRAIN TRACKS:
Guys, this looks awesome — it looks like a roller coaster . . . WHY DID YOU KNOCK HIS TRACK DOWN just because you think it looks more like a real roller coaster than yours does? DO NOT hit him with that plastic track!
FAMILY MOVIE NIGHT:
Awww, they’re cuddling . . . wait, no, it’s wrestling . . . no, I think it’s cuddling. Nope, definitely wrestling. And when someone gets hurt, I’m turning the movie off.
WAITING IN LINE:
KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF, get off that railing, and don’t think I don’t see you kicking your brother. (clobber clobber, punch punch, subtle kick)
Awww, you guys set up a store! OK, I’m here to buy this toy and some snacks if you sell any. WHY ARE YOU CRYING AND SCREAMING AND PUSHING THE CASH REGISTER ONTO HIS FOOT? You guys have work it out and take turns being the bagger and the cashier.
YOU THREW THE HARD-BOILED EGG AT HIM BECAUSE IT WAS THE EGG YOU WANTED? Do you see we have a bowl of a dozen hard-boiled eggs here? What was so special about that one?
We set up an assembly line. One kid adds the flour, one adds the sugar, one adds the baking soda. You get the idea. Have you ever seen a bowl full of powdery ingredients get passed forcefully from one kid to the next? It’s messy! But the last time we baked our traditional pumpkin bread, everyone had fun, everyone behaved, until I asked them to get close and pose with the finished product. PUNCH.
Me: Why is E lying on the shower floor? R: “I guess he got pushed down as we were rushing ahead to see who would shower first.”
The game is called “Sorry,” but I haven’t heard that word come out of your mouths because you’ve been too busy fighting over which card pile is neater.
GETTING OUT OF THE CAR:
This one may be my favorite. Three boys, big backpacks, multiple car doors. Plenty of room. But this is how they get out of a car.
What full contact “sports” have your sons mastered in your family? Can we put this nature vs. nurture discussion to rest now?
GIVEAWAY! Are you exhausted from being referee to these full-contact activities at your house? YOU DESERVE A TREAT FOR YOU! M.O.B. Truths has partnered with Real Cookies Bakery to give away two dozen delicious cookies! Interested? FOLLOW @mobtruths on Instagram, comment on this post in Instagram with a cookie emoji, AND FOLLOW @realcookiesbakery on Instagram. A winner will be randomly selected on Sunday, November 24, 2017. Don’t follow if you plan to unfollow – we’re hoping you’re with us for good!